Chapter 4 - Spring's Warming Kisses

The weekend was finally here. Victoria checked her reflection for the fifteenth time, making sure her teeth looked clean and her hair looked combed. She made sure the outfit she picked out had no wrinkles and she tried unsuccessfully, for about the twentieth time, to convince herself that she wasn't nervous. But, for the twentieth time, it didn't work. Victoria felt almost sick to her stomach from her jumbled nerves. She was going on her first official date with Shane this afternoon, and she couldn't have been more excited.

Besides spending a whole afternoon with Shane, which was thrilling enough by itself, she would also be away from here. Fireworks had erupted when Clayton and her father got into it over Clay getting fired. Getting fired was not acceptable for a VanDoren. Victoria had been extremely grateful to take care of Bradley because it served as a nice distraction from listening to the two fighting.

She couldn't believe the holidays were nearly here. It would have been nice for her family to celebrate Thanksgiving, as many other families did. Like they used to do. But Victoria had long ago given up such fairytale dreams.

When she was little, the family crowded around the table, drooling over the beautiful roasted bird her mother had made, and smelling the fresh homemade apple pie that was just starting to bake. Each person would have a turn to give thanks for something in their life. And hers was always the same.

"I'm thankful for my family." which would always earn her a smile of tenderness from Katherine, and a very slight (he always tried to hide it) tinge of redness to Erik's face. She liked that she could make him blush with love for her. Even Clay would smile at her. He would make gagging signs behind his parents' backs, and she would giggle at him. Then they would eat and talk and eat some more.

But that was before Brad had been born. Mother didn't have the energy for a big dinner, Victoria barely knew how to cook, and they had no family to visit. As the years went on, Thanksgiving just became another day on the calendar.

She snorted to herself wondering how a family dinner would go, now, where each member was expected to give thanks. There they would all be, around the table.

Brad would not be there, as usual, because Erik couldn't bear the embarassment of his son's antics. Clay would be thankful that God invented pot. Katherine would be so exhausted she would fall asleep in her chair.

Erik would be thankful the stupid maid's boobs took his mind off the failing health of his wife. And Victoria would be thankful to live in a huge house, surrounded by a bunch of strangers she had to call her family.

The chiming ring of the doorbell interrupted her thoughts. She peeked out the window and saw a modest four door sedan parked along the street. She raced downstairs, smoothed out her dress, took a deep breath to try and calm her nerves, and opened the door. There, standing before her, was easily the most handsome boy she had ever laid eyes on. His eyes, which could almost be mistaken for chips of sapphire, glinted in the afternoon sun. This was the first time she had ever seen him in natural sunlight, outside of the club with its colored lighting. She hadn't realized how deep his complexion was, a light bronze color that made his eyes look even brighter. His sleek black hair, combined with his crooked smile and layred tee, gave him a roguish appearance; not quite bad boy, but just a hint of a rebellion.

Victoria was drawn to him like a magnet. And now she was on a date with him! She couldn't believe how lucky she was. Dating a junior, who ever would have thought it possible?

They went to Rex's, a little diner downtown renowned for its spectacular greasy cheeseburgers. Victoria had never been to Rex's (VanDorens don't eat at such establisments), and she was immediately enamored by its bold red and white décor.

A jukebox in the corner kept the atmosphere inviting and comfortable. It had the feel of a 50's diner, and Victoria's problems dissolved as soon as she walked in the door. There was no VanDoren family anymore, just this fabulous place, full of young people, a few old, and everything in between.

And there was Shane. Shane whose eyes caught the light from the outside window that was opposite him and reflected it back a thousandfold, so animated with a spark of life, a promise of what the world had to offer and a determination to make it his. Victoria had a strong feeling that if Shane wanted the moon for his own personal treasure, he would find a way to get it.

Victoria was under a spell as she sat across from Shane, watching his eyes dance as he talked about his future. She mused that she was a sad princess, trapped in a horrible castle, under the control of an evil and powerful overlord, and Shane was a handsome prince coming to take her away. Then she realized she wasn't even listening to what he was saying and forced herself to tune back in to the conversation.

"I'd love you to hear me sometime."

"That would be great." What were they talking about again?

"Hey, are you okay? You look like you're a million miles away."

"I'm sorry. I've just had a rough week."

"Problems at home?"

Victoria tried to brush off the question, but against her will felt her brows furrow and her cheeks start to burn. "I don't want to talk about my family. You were saying?"

"Oh, okay. I was saying that I think I'm getting pretty good and would like you to come over sometime and listen. We don't have an official band name yet, but we have lots of time to come up with one."

"I'd love to."

He smiled that lopsided grin again. The one that made her realize she was falling in love with him. Or at least she thought she was. It was hard being 15. Her parents would probably tell her she was too young to be in love with anyone, that she didn't even know what love is. But she knew what she felt. And the intensity of her feelings was almost enough to lose herself in. She wished this date would never end, that she could sit here and gaze at his beautiful face forever.

But a couple of hours later, it did end. After some rigorous dancing, and then a rich chocolate malt, Shane took her home. Dread filled her as they pulled up in front of her house. She hated it here. She wished she could live anywhere else. She thought about running away often, but where would she go? Who would take care of Bradley when her mother was too tired? Not Clayton. And certainly not her father.

She sighed with resignation as Shane opened her car door for her. She stepped out and received a warm hug. She inhaled the musky scent on his neck and wondered if he was shaving, yet. His face was baby smooth.

Shane grasped her hands in his. "Can we do this again tomorrow?"

"I can't stay out this late on a Sunday."

"Then be ready by eight and we'll go out for breakfast. We can spend the day at the mall and I'll have you home by six."

"That sounds great. I'll see you at eight."

She knew her parents wouldn't care if she went out during the day. But if she came home after dark on a school night, there'd be hell to pay. She waved goodbye as Shane climbed into his car, then headed up the walkway into the house. But she wasn't walking, she was floating.

She floated all the way across the front room, where, for once, the sounds of her dad and Clay arguing didn't bother her. She floated upstairs where it was blissfully quiet. She thought about checking in on Bradley, but since there was no sound coming from his room, she figured he was either asleep or almost asleep. If he was nearly asleep and she went into his room, he would become extremely agitated. Then it would take an hour, at least, to calm him down. The frustration would ruin her perfect evening.

Instead, she decided to float on into bed, and fall asleep thinking about Shane's blue, blue eyes.

*~*~*~*~

The next day dawned bright and cheerful. Although fall, the weather was unseasonably warm, and Victoria was enjoying the no coat weather. As an added bonus, there wasn't a single cloud visible in the sky, which was a rich azure expanse as far as the eye could see. Victoria sprang out of bed at six and hopped into the shower, where she sang a song she and Shane had heard yesterday at the diner. She could hardly believe she got to spend the whole entire day with him.

After she was done getting ready, she peeked in on her mother and Bradley to let them know she would be out for the day but would be back by supper time. Katherine was rubbing a corn silk brush vigorously up and down Brad's back with long quick strokes.

Her mother stood up to face her. “That's good, honey, because your father is inviting a friend over for dinner, and I'll need some help with Bradley.”

This was the most her mother had said to her in weeks. She wondered to herself how her mother would find the strength to cook supper after doing Bradley's therapy sessions all day. She would probably have to take a nap.

The sun streaming through the window did little to enhance Katherine's pale complexion. If anything, it made her look even chalkier than usual, and seemed to highlight the fine wrinkles near her eyes and at the corners of her mouth. “You look very pretty," she said. "Where are you going?”

“I'm going out with Shane again.” She couldn't keep the enthusiasm out of her voice, it was just too surreal.

Katherine's face clouded in confusion. “Shane?” she echoed hollowly.

“Yeah, I told you about him, remember?” Her mother looked at the floor, trying to place the name.

“He's a boy from school. We talked about him two days ago.”

“Oh. Of course honey, I remember now. You two have a good time.”

She didn't remember. It was obvious she was trying to cover it up, but Victoria could see the truth in her mother's eyes. Her memory was getting worse. She felt like she wanted to cry, but was determined to go out and have a good time today.

As if on cue, she heard Shane's car pull up in front of the house. This time, she didn't bother to wait for him to knock. She bounded down the stairs and out the door, running away from this horrid house. Shane looked surprised when he saw her running out, but met her at the end of the sidewalk. “Wow. You're...you look beautiful.”

Victoria blushed and looked away, smiling what she hoped wasn't a goofy smile. “Thank you,” she said sheepishly as she climbed into the open door.

As normal for a weekend, the mall was bustling. Being in such a small town definitely had its disadvantages. There wasn't much to do, so often people packed this hang out spot all weekend.

They walked along, checking out the small shops. It may be a small town, but the mall was quite large and played host to many small specialty stores. Victoria expected to feel awkward with Shane, since they didn't know each other that well.

But it was quite the opposite. He was easy going, much more so than she, and was so willing to share things about his life with her. She found herself wanting to talk to him about herself, her family, but the thought frightened her, as well.

What would he think? Would he think they were all crazy? She certainly felt like she lived in an asylum, with Clay and Erik always screaming at each other, Bradley playing ping pong ball – literally – jumping on furniture, bouncing off walls, people, and objects, her mother shuffling around like a sickly inmate, having therapy sessions with Bradley, and sleeping so much. No, she decided it was best not to tell him. He might run away in fear.

When they got to Sasha's, Victoria grabbed Shane's hand and eagerly pulled him in. Sasha's was a hip clothing store with all the newest fashions, some vintage fashions, modern décor, swinging music, and a lot to see. Victoria could literally spend all day here, and couldn't wait to see what was new. There may be lots of dreary things about her life, but at least she could wear whatever she wanted. Her parents never cared what she spent. They probably would if it was extravagant, but Victoria never over did it, she knew where the limit was.

The last thing she wanted to do was draw any more attention to herself from her dad. She wanted to when she was a little younger, but now she just wanted to be invisible. Get her chores done, do her homework, and avoid him. Both her parents, actually, because she couldn't stand to be around her mother that much these days, either.

She dragged Shane to the male clothing section and started to flip through the rack while he stood chuckling behind her.

"Here. Try this on," she handed him a trendy looking outfit.

"What? What's wrong with my teeshirt and jeans?"

"Nothing," she replied honestly. She loved his look. "I just want to see what it looks like on you."

"Okay," he said in an exaggerated annoyed tone. "I'll try on this dorky outfit just for you."

Victoria giggled at him, thrusting the hanger into his hand. She looked through the rack and found another outfit for him while he was in the dressing room.

"How stupid do I look?"

Victoria burst out laughing. "You..." she couldn't finish because she was laughing so hard. "You look...,"

Shane put his hands on his hips in mock anger. "Laughing at me, huh? I knew this was a bad idea."

"It's just not you. Here, try this one."

Shane eyed the clothes skeptically, took them, and headed back to the dressing room.

This time he emerged looking quite handsome, even though he resembled a reject from a casting of Peter Pan. His collar was crooked, and he had missed a button. Victoria fixed his collar, feeling her hands tremble slightly. She buttoned the shirt, smoothed it out, then picked a piece of lint off of the shoulder. She was aware of his eyes on her, and when she looked up at him, she saw him looking at her seriously.

The situation made her nervous, so she backed away and smiled brightly. "There. You look like a million bucks."

"You really think so? I thought it was more like...," he lifted his arm and pulled the price tag closer for a better look. "$250."

Victoria laughed at him. He looked handsome, but just not quite right. When he put his own clothes back on, the layred tee and jeans, she realized that was the best look for him. It matched his personality.

The best thing about eating at the mall was all the different food choices. Several different food bars lined the wall.

Victoria was in the mood for a fat stack of flapjacks dripping with syrup. The atmosphere of the food court was spacious, and sounds seemed to echo throughout it. Kids playing, parents chattering, babies babbling, the aqariums bubbling.

"Can you come over next weekend? My band is meeting to practice. I'd love for you to come hear us. You could meet my parents."

"That would be great."

"Maybe I could meet your parents sometime, too."

“Oh. Uh, yeah. That would be...,” Terrifying? Nerve-wracking? Worse than watching all three Carla's Nightmare movies back to back to back? “...great.”

He smiled at her as he shoved a bite into his mouth.

“I had a great time, Vicky.” He reached down and grabbed her hands.

Victoria's heart fluttered in her chest. “Me too.”

“So...next Saturday you'll come over around noon?”

“I'll be there with bells on.”

“Great. See you then. He leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek. She waved goodbye as he hopped back into his car and drove away.

She always rolled her eyes when she saw those parts in movies with teen romances in them. The parts where a girl would get a kiss from a boy on the cheek and she would swoon and say something stupid like, “I'll never wash my face again.”

Victoria felt like that right now. Her cheek felt warm and tingly, but more than that. It's like she could feel Shane's presence right there, could still feel his soft lips on her face. It felt like a whisper, light and caressing. She never wanted to wash her face again.

Her father was on the phone when she got home. She didn't pay it much mind, because he was on the phone often, and headed for the bathroom. She was just about to close the door when she stopped. Erick's voice sounded strange. Kind of high pitched and happy. Almost giddy. “I would love it if you stayed after work tomorrow. My wife will be out late with an appointment, and I can leave the office early.”

What? Her father never left the office early. That was just not something a VanDoren man did.

“I'm looking forward to seeing you then,” her father said into the phone. When she heard him replace the phone in its cradle, she shut the door quickly, wondering what that was all about.

His sudden knock on the door made her nearly jump out of her skin.

“Victoria, I need you to get supper started.”

She opened the door and looked into her father's eyes. “Where's mom?”

“Your mother is feeling ill and went to bed early. Mr. Barrington will be here at 7.”

She looked at her watch. 6:15. She better get started.

From the moment she met Nathan Barrington, Victoria didn't like him. He was pleasant enough, but there was just something about him that made her feel uncomfortable. It was the way he looked at her, like he was scrutinizing her all the time, watching every move she made like a cat stalking its prey.

He was already at the table when Victoria set the food out, homemade macaroni and cheese, which was all she had time for, and Erick was washing up.

Nathan was a handsome man, dark complected with black hair and emerald green eyes. He was a couple of years younger than her dad, or at least he looked like he was. He didn't have the same wrinkles at his eyes or the clenched jaw Erick had. Although the clenched jaw she knew to be from stress, not age. Nathan's was relaxed.

The entire dinner was torture for Victoria. Every time Nathan looked at her, she felt like he could see inside of her, that he knew her innermost secrets.

She was happy when the two would talk shop and she could zone out and think about Shane, but it seemed like every time she did, Nathan would manage to steer the conversation back to a topic that would include her.

“Do you have any boyfriends?”

Victoria choked on her macaroni at the abruptness of his question. She looked at her father, hoping to see a man who would defend her and chastise Nathan for asking such an inappropriate question to a teenage girl he had just met. But that's not what she saw. She saw, instead, a man who looked at her expectantly, waiting for her to answer the question.

Finally managing to choke the noodle down, Victoria took a deep breath. “Yes I do, actually.”

Nathan half smiled at her and stared hard. She had to look away, she couldn't take it. Why did he look at her like that? It made her feel on guard, apprehensive.

Victoria breathed a shaky sigh of relief when the two men retired to the study to discuss work. Her hands were trembling in the anxious wake of dinner, and she hastily cleared the table so she could go up to her room before her father asked her to come and be a good hostess. What an awful supper.